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Welcome My name is Tess. I'm a 9-5 New Yorker and traveler. My hobbies include destroying suitcases, photo-bombing tourists in Times Square, and taking long romantic ADHD walks around the globe. Welcome!

Aug 24, 2012

I Fink Your Freaky and I Like You A Lot



So if you stand still for too long in Times Square someone is bound to ask if you will take a photo for them.  Which is cool because it gives me the opportunity to ask travelers "So how do you like New York City!?"

what conversation took place between him and his barber before this

The answers are endless ranging from "It smells" to "I want to die here" Once I was even told, "I came here to have my baby" (literally folks she was pregnant) But the number one reason given to me by travelers is....
"Because it's New York" 

Therefore when  someone (Non-American ) asked me how I felt about New York, a plethora of politically correct answers came to mind. But what came out was "Because in New York you can be who you want to be 25 hours a day 8 days a week.

In his defense when I first noticed "Bikini man" several months ago in Times Square
he was wearing a leisure suit and riding this bike.  I don't know what happened, but I can tell you that this is not the only bikini he owns now.  Maybe he was just smoking with this dude......

Earning money for recreational activities is a breeze.
Getting your friends, who also partake in your cipher, to keep their clothes on is the tricky part .

I mean where else can you see Mormons and pum-pum shorts walking side-by-side? Let's face it, New York is not in any danger of losing its cultural diversity. Not only is it encouraged, we pride ourselves on freedom of expression.  

Jews, Gentiles, Mormons, and the damned, we all share an equal love for flip-flops!  

NYC is home to more than 60 film and television productions many of which you can attend for free. And we have over a dozen Disney characters roaming the streets throughout the day. 

She is not the Disney character I was referring to, but she will do.

Ah yes, Tiger flanked by Minnie 

Nikki Minaj extremists

Mermaid Ave in Brooklyn's Coney Island

I mean doesn't every state have pirates and Greek gods travelling by subway? How else are you going to find a date in New York!  Other options are simply becoming the person you want to be with.  Yes, dressing in drag takes all the guess work out of the question of: "What are you looking for in a woman?" 

Where the guys look better as girls than the girls look as girls - did you get that?

 Sojust to reiterate my point, go ahead and be who you want to be in New York - we won't judge you!  But don't come crying to us in the 25th hour when you look like this.... 

.. So get your sh*t together ok - becasue you asked for this! Or stay the
fugg outta this city if you can't hang homie!


  1. No, not everyone can hang in NYC. The energy is contagious and it's so entertaining, as your pix show. I just couldn't handle living there but it's a great place to visit.

  2. Spot on Fly Girl. This city is not for the meek! But everyone should experience it at least once ...lol... then check it off the bucket list!




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