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Welcome My name is Tess. I'm a 9-5 New Yorker and traveler. My hobbies include destroying suitcases, photo-bombing tourists in Times Square, and taking long romantic ADHD walks around the globe. Welcome!

Sep 3, 2014

Green Space All Up In Yo' Face

So, Which "Woolly Wall Pockets" combination is this!?
Dave &  Henrie Whitcomb's 2500 sq foot vertical garden wall in New York's Greenwich Village


There's a certain sense of calm you get from having green."

Nope I'm not talking about the maybe-illegal-depending-on-where-you-live kind....  I am actually referring to the kind you luxuriate in - Nature.

Many of us normal folk' can attest to the statement above, made by Joe McMillan, the CEO of developer DDG Partners. But not on his level.  He and a bunch of other ridiculously rich Manhattan dwellers, are spending beaucoup bucks, some up to half a million dollars, to create green spaces on the terraces and roofs of their multi-million dollar penthouses.


70 Little West St.  battery Park.  Home of Fred Rich and his 2000 square ft Botanical slap in the face.
“I feel incredibly privileged to be able to pick and eat fresh fruit and vegetables in the city; the flavor of fresh-picked food is incomparable,” - Fred Rich, as told to The New York Post.  And from the looks of his rooftop, clearly he ain't referring to the aisles in Wholefoods y'all.

Japanese maples spruces, pines, thyme and fruit trees..... These people are growing Panera Bread salads on their penthouse decks and while we fumble around with  woolly pockets on our bedroom walls.

A clearer depiction of NYC garden terraces


My thoughts on this? Get tha Fugg outta here!
While I completely understand, I can't help but laugh. Here's why.
When I'm out dranking and yucking it up with my New York cohorts, they always say "why" or "That's too bad" when they find out that I am a suburban dweller. and I always shrug with an understanding smile.  But to be truthfully honest...... please keep your crummy sympathy.

One reason?  Because while these guys run to parks for green space, along side the hoards of bikini and speedo clad sunbathers, masturbaters, and crusty characters, I simply go into the backyard.
Many of them don't even know that their coveted Central Park was laid with over 18,000 yards of Jersey manure? Yup, it's true!


Central Park scavenger hunt for green space.
Photo credit: Flicker.com

For the love of Jesus people, let's stop acting like this city doesn't treat nature as an accessory instead of a necessity. It's awesome to work and play in the city that never sleeps. But when the party is done I skip my ass back to the abundantly green suburbs.  It's like living on the more developed part of a third world.  You know, like when you go to Jamaica and the resort is beautiful, then you step your foots outside the resort into Jamrock. (No shade Jamaica - 1-Love)

Honestly I think some of these urban dwellers suffer a little "suburb envy".  I mean how else can you explain it?  Perhaps you can get a landscaping job on this guys terrace