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Welcome My name is Tess. I'm a 9-5 New Yorker and traveler. My hobbies include destroying suitcases, photo-bombing tourists in Times Square, and taking long romantic ADHD walks around the globe. Welcome!

Jun 24, 2012

The Need To Vacate

Stop drooling all over other people's travel posts and pics! And go out and see the world for yourself !  

You've got your reasons for not going on vacation - of course you do. And many of those reasons are flimsy valid. But you look like sh*t. Yup most of you look like you need a vacation so bad that it makes your breath stink.  And it must be torturous living vicariously through the adventures of others?

So I'm getting ready to hit the airport it's been months and I've got the travel junkie itch. Eurasia is looking good, so I'm fleeing the country again bishes!

Strutting outside of the truck in Nairobi National park.
 Not a good idea if you've read Afrika 101  Meals On Wheels

Did you know that statistics show the average American works 5-10 more hours a week compared to many other developed first-world countries?

And it's my opinion that Europeans & Asians (living in their respective countries) travel the most. I mean the Japanese get around more than a hunts point hooker (in a travel sense that is) Europeans also seem to account for the largest number of expatriates living abroad.

Been to the caribbean lately? The Germans have been there so long that they speak patios. And I'm guessing it has something to do with the four week holidays they get as opposed to America's general policy of two weeks which is just dispicable.



Harass The Giraffe
Curious to know how all those documentaries on National Geographic are made?  Easy! Just tell safari goers (like myself for example) that they can go into a national park unsupervised in their own vehicles and they will chase down the animals. 


The source of my biased? Well the Travel Channel series House Hunters International for one. However statistically, the USA is ranked No.2 of the top international travel destinations in the world. And let's face it  people don't come from France, Italy, and Sweden to visit Nutbush Tennesee USA. 

New York is the No.1 destination.  But just because I live here doesn't mean that I have no aspiration to get the fugg outta this bish.
 Trying to have a Meryl Streep "Out of Africa" moment while overlooking
the Eastern the Great Rift Valley in Naivasha, Kenya.
Yeah it was pretty-frigging amazing

Seriously, at what point do you say "F*ck it - the rent just won't get paid this month...I'm going to Abu Dhabi Sohn!" Trinidadians do this regularly at Carnival time. Mainly because a ticket to Trinidad and the costume to "play mas"can easily consume a paycheck. But that doesn't seem to to stop the feather and sequin costumes from flowing in Port of Spain.

Market in Tanzania
Make friends with locals and they will show you the town!

By now, most of you have probably blown your tax returns on swanky new summer wardrobes. But some of you just dusted off last season's threads and bought a ticket to Machupichu, or Florida or El Segundo, Or West Bumbaf*ck for all I care. But if you did that - then you did the right thing.

Budget travel 12/2011
Roaming through Rome.
For those of you who effed up your tax return again - get ready to watch your friends and coworkers frolic off into vacation bliss- while your dumb azz crunches numbers in your cubicle - again. Life is short and paychecks are even shorter. Get with the program vacations are for vacating.

Travel, becauase you never know who you are going to meet


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